Hahaah a
well i feel like an utter asshole.
it has been a very very very long time.....
a new bong shop was opened in olds. i guess i would be alot more stoked if i was still a pothead. but they do sell really cheap cigarettes. if you can call them that.
anyways... so there is a huge controversy over this shop.
people are really pissed off. it's kind of cool. there is something actually going on here.
so of course i have to get into it.
hehe

heartbrake

haha i love puns... it's kind of funny how heartbreak actually physically hurts, and it happens without a whisper of get ready i am coming courtesy... or is it possible to know everytime when you are going to get your heart broken? like i knew. i fucking knew. and yet it still hurts. why do i tend to lie to myself? but what if you put on your heart brake and what you were so scared about isn't true, but does that ever happen?
no matter what species or machine, there are always go and stop. that's the two simple things in life. you can either go or stop
stop or go, go or stop, stop or go, go or stop..........
hmmmmm..... how does one person go? do they just count to three and GO or do they count to three and hesitate, and then count to three again? and again? and again? funny how ironic love is.... can you both be going at the same time or would you bang heads? like am i forever doomed to have one party going and the other party stopping.....
i don't know
lyz can you email me if you read this?

Yay Ignorance!!!

i went on a trip today...
i saw some things that remind me of who i used to be...
and i realised that these people are me...
i realised that these people can change...
i realised that no one looks at them and sees these things...
i realised that these people are just in a hole...
i realised that i wanted to cry...
i realised that i used to be them...
i realised that i want to help them change...
i realised that they may not want to change...
and i realised that these people are me...
i saw some things that remind me of who i used to be...
i went on a trip today...

I asked myself out on a date today...it was a hot date

haha i did actually ask myself out on a lunch date, it was nice but i wanted to have sex with myself but i was a frigid bitch... ahah
i feel like an ass sometimes, by the things that you say, it's kind of fun to watch people and how they walk on eggshells just so that they don't step on any toes. it's also kind of funny how sensitive people are... i know i am. which is funny because most people wouldn't think so, but i think that is the problem with misconception, everyone jugdes by what they see. but how else do they judge it?? i don't fucking know

i dont know

sorry about the title but i could not think of anything that would fit what i wanted to talk about... i watched that movie Bowling for Columbine and yah it was a cool movie, yah i thought they did a good job, but i hated how it made me feel. i felt totally helpless. i am sorry for all of those people that love that movie, rock on... i sat there and i watched all of these things that totally disgust me and i am wanting to change it but i am not american. i cannot go to the U.S. and start bitching about everything and actually expect them to listen to someone that has never lived there... and also another thing that really bothered me was the fact is that they put all of this information in front of you, and then give you nothing, not even in the credits did they give yout that fast forwardwebsite that you would have to pause the movie to see. yah sure they did something with that k-mart, but what can you do, it is already done. they do not talk about helping eachother and how we can maybe help eachother out. i was disgusted with people on that movie, and basically how everything was okay, and i know that that was what buddy was going for, but some people like myself, i would fucking love to help and change things, but i am a fucking canadian and i do not think that people from the states would like to hear what a foreigner has to say. they have to help themselves i guess.

i hate how everyone seems to have this perfect idea on how you should be and what you should like

Fuck them

dreams

i find myself dreaming of things that i never, even now thought really mattered in this world we live in today. i try to change my dreams, but i feel as though no matter what i may do . i will always end up there. in that world of spying eyes and thoughtless words. i look at how i am now and how i think, and i realize that i am there now. i am there in spirit and in mind, just not in body...yet. i have always been told that i speak in very vague ways. does that mean that i am trying to hide something? hmmm...
i dedicate my love here and now to my little hippie that never bores of hearing about my hopless romantic side.
oh how i miss her being by my side in this hateful reality we once shared.

shut up lyz i love you

hahahahahahahahahahaha

"it's coming on christmas
they're cutting down trees
putting up reindeer and singing songs of joy and peace
oh i wish i had a river
i could skate away on"

someday's christmas makes me want to vomit or scream
does that make me a scrooge
what do you think
am i a hopeless romantic lyz?
i need you to be my psychiatrist
what's wrong with me lyz???
huhuhuhuhhu
god i need sleep
fuck ya